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Three Ways to Belong.

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We are more than a location; we are a movement of radical love that refuses to leave anyone behind. We provide the intentional space where visionaries can ground their ambition in peace, and we serve as the amplified voices for a new generation of storytellers. At The Belonging Collective, your soul, your work, and your story finally have a home."

From Miami to Jersey I can't describe the amount of fun and laughs I had spending quality time with some of me and hubby’s favorite couples! #marriedlife #couplecomedy #miami #lovethem

From Miami to Jersey I can't describe the amount of fun and laughs I had spending quality time with some of me and hubby’s favorite couples! #marriedlife #couplecomedy #miami #lovethem

My little gymnast is doing her splits anywhere at any given moment! 🥰🥰😂😂❤️❤️ #avelshennell #mybabygirl #gymnastics #gymnast

My little gymnast is doing her splits anywhere at any given moment! 🥰🥰😂😂❤️❤️ #avelshennell #mybabygirl #gymnastics #gymnast

I always wanted a Scorpio for a daughter! Thankfully @b_no_do brought one into my life Sweet, kind, funny, foodie and doesn’t play! ❤️ #bonusmom #mommydaughterlove #stepmomma #floridalifestyle

I always wanted a Scorpio for a daughter! Thankfully @b_no_do brought one into my life Sweet, kind, funny, foodie and doesn’t play! ❤️ #bonusmom #mommydaughterlove #stepmomma #floridalifestyle

When I say I looooovvveee to see this man happy, I mean I loooovvee to see my baby happy ❤️. #happypartner #happylife❤️ #happyhusband #blacklove

When I say I looooovvveee to see this man happy, I mean I loooovvee to see my baby happy ❤️. #happypartner #happylife❤️ #happyhusband #blacklove

Brandon Lomax, each time we go out, it feels like you've arranged for the restaurant to be closed to the public because I never see anyone but you ❤️.

Brandon Lomax, each time we go out, it feels like you've arranged for the restaurant to be closed to the public because I never see anyone but you ❤️.

My Heart. My Rock. My Best Friend. My Husband ❤️.

My Heart. My Rock. My Best Friend. My Husband ❤️.

Some women show up in your life and never leave your cornerno matter the distance, no matter the season.

Senator @angelavmcknight has been supporting me since I was 18, just learning what social justice really means. She became a sister in this work, always rooting for me, always reminding me to keep going.

Dr. @angela_garretson , Council President of Hillside, has given me a safe space to share my journey—the highs, the lows, and everything in between. With her encouragement, I found the courage to launch my wildest dreams.

Whatever they need, I’ll always show up for them, the way they’ve shown up for me.

Grateful for women who lead, pour, and protect. Here’s to sisterhood—real, unwavering, and true.

#WomenWhoLead #Gratitude #TheNewarkPenthouse #WomenSupportingWomen

Some women show up in your life and never leave your cornerno matter the distance, no matter the season.

Senator @angelavmcknight has been supporting me since I was 18, just learning what social justice really means. She became a sister in this work, always rooting for me, always reminding me to keep going.

Dr. @angela_garretson , Council President of Hillside, has given me a safe space to share my journey—the highs, the lows, and everything in between. With her encouragement, I found the courage to launch my wildest dreams.

Whatever they need, I’ll always show up for them, the way they’ve shown up for me.

Grateful for women who lead, pour, and protect. Here’s to sisterhood—real, unwavering, and true.

#WomenWhoLead #Gratitude #TheNewarkPenthouse #WomenSupportingWomen

BEYOND THE BALLOT COMING SOON.

I am so proud to officially announce Beyond the Ballot, a new series on the Belonging Media Network. This project has been a labor of love, designed to explore that critical space where the vote ends and the power begins. We aren’t just looking at the results; we’re looking at the reality.

Bringing a vision of this scale to life requires a village of excellence, and I am deeply grateful to the team that made it possible:

The Credits: Produced by @freedomstudiosinc | Sponsored by @njit | Cinematic Production by The Highlander Studio at NJIT | Photography by @john.barragan.f | Makeup by @livbeautemua | Special thanks to @angela_garretson and @iamdrbritt

Join us for the premiere on Wednesday, May 6, 2026.
READY TO TUNE IN? 📲 Scan the QR code on the flyer to subscribe to our YouTube channel!

It’s time to move beyond the ballot and into the room where it happens. See you there.

#BeyondTheBallot #BelongingMediaNetwork #NJIT #womeninmedia #PowerAndEquity

BEYOND THE BALLOT COMING SOON.

I am so proud to officially announce Beyond the Ballot, a new series on the Belonging Media Network. This project has been a labor of love, designed to explore that critical space where the vote ends and the power begins. We aren’t just looking at the results; we’re looking at the reality.

Bringing a vision of this scale to life requires a village of excellence, and I am deeply grateful to the team that made it possible:

The Credits: Produced by @freedomstudiosinc | Sponsored by @njit | Cinematic Production by The Highlander Studio at NJIT | Photography by @john.barragan.f | Makeup by @livbeautemua | Special thanks to @angela_garretson and @iamdrbritt

Join us for the premiere on Wednesday, May 6, 2026.
READY TO TUNE IN? 📲 Scan the QR code on the flyer to subscribe to our YouTube channel!

It’s time to move beyond the ballot and into the room where it happens. See you there.

#BeyondTheBallot #BelongingMediaNetwork #NJIT #womeninmedia #PowerAndEquity

There’s one person I have to honor today—my husband, @b_no_do .

Most people see the milestones: buying my grandmother’s home, the emotions, the journey. But what you don’t see is the man behind it all—the one who stood beside me through every setback and every win. When I met Brandon, I was just starting to build my credit. He didn’t just believe in me—he taught me, pushed me, and gave me the tools to reach a 715 credit score. That changed everything and made this dream possible.

But even more than that, he never let me give up. On days when I lost faith, he reminded me who I am. When I doubted, he stood steady in his belief in us. While I was fighting for my grandmother’s home, he was quietly building our future in real estate—building a legacy with me, brick by brick.

That’s what partnership looks like. That’s what love in action feels like. Without Brandon’s unwavering support, this moment wouldn’t exist. This is our win.

Thank you for loving me, building with me, and seeing our future before it was real. I love you in each lifetime.

#blacklove #legacy #wealth #generationalwealth #credit

There’s one person I have to honor today—my husband, @b_no_do .

Most people see the milestones: buying my grandmother’s home, the emotions, the journey. But what you don’t see is the man behind it all—the one who stood beside me through every setback and every win. When I met Brandon, I was just starting to build my credit. He didn’t just believe in me—he taught me, pushed me, and gave me the tools to reach a 715 credit score. That changed everything and made this dream possible.

But even more than that, he never let me give up. On days when I lost faith, he reminded me who I am. When I doubted, he stood steady in his belief in us. While I was fighting for my grandmother’s home, he was quietly building our future in real estate—building a legacy with me, brick by brick.

That’s what partnership looks like. That’s what love in action feels like. Without Brandon’s unwavering support, this moment wouldn’t exist. This is our win.

Thank you for loving me, building with me, and seeing our future before it was real. I love you in each lifetime.

#blacklove #legacy #wealth #generationalwealth #credit

Today, I officially closed on my grandmother Madonna’s house.

It’s hard to describe what this home means to me. It’s the place where I took my first steps, where every holiday felt magical, and where I always knew I was loved. This is where my parents got married, where family gathered for laughter and long talks, and where my grandmother wrapped us all in the kind of love that makes you feel safe no matter how old you get.

This house saw me through every season—childhood joy, tough times, and new beginnings. It’s where I returned when life was heavy, and where I found peace and healing again and again.

Today, I feel deeply honored to carry her legacy forward. My promise is to keep her spirit alive in these walls—to fill this home with the same warmth, care, and connection she gave so freely. I hope it continues to be a place where our family’s story grows.

Thank you, Madonna, for the foundation and the love. I hope you’re proud.

Still ours. Always.

#FamilyLegacyFullCircle #Home #Gratitude #HonoringHer #eastorange

Today, I officially closed on my grandmother Madonna’s house.

It’s hard to describe what this home means to me. It’s the place where I took my first steps, where every holiday felt magical, and where I always knew I was loved. This is where my parents got married, where family gathered for laughter and long talks, and where my grandmother wrapped us all in the kind of love that makes you feel safe no matter how old you get.

This house saw me through every season—childhood joy, tough times, and new beginnings. It’s where I returned when life was heavy, and where I found peace and healing again and again.

Today, I feel deeply honored to carry her legacy forward. My promise is to keep her spirit alive in these walls—to fill this home with the same warmth, care, and connection she gave so freely. I hope it continues to be a place where our family’s story grows.

Thank you, Madonna, for the foundation and the love. I hope you’re proud.

Still ours. Always.

#FamilyLegacyFullCircle #Home #Gratitude #HonoringHer #eastorange

Me after realizing I actually made it through this week.

Avel is my little spirit animal. #avelshennell

Me after realizing I actually made it through this week.

Avel is my little spirit animal. #avelshennell

ADONIS WON DEFENSIVE PLAYER OF THE YEAR- Last night I had the deep honor of watching my son win Defensive Player of the year for on the Mapso 3rd Grade Basketball Team. My son played super hard this year, never gave up and was able to do all of this as a second grader playing for a third grade team. I’m SUPER proud of him and can’t wait to see what’s in store for him and the team this Spring. #adonismccloud #basketball #mapsobasketball #proudmommy

ADONIS WON DEFENSIVE PLAYER OF THE YEAR- Last night I had the deep honor of watching my son win Defensive Player of the year for on the Mapso 3rd Grade Basketball Team. My son played super hard this year, never gave up and was able to do all of this as a second grader playing for a third grade team. I’m SUPER proud of him and can’t wait to see what’s in store for him and the team this Spring. #adonismccloud #basketball #mapsobasketball #proudmommy

TODAY I HONOR AVON- On the 8th of Women’s History Month, I’m thrilled to honor my baby girl Avon! Her artwork was chosen for the Just Like a Girl Exhibit at the 1978 Maplewood Arts Center alongside a few other select pieces. Our family showed up and showed out to support her first-ever art exhibit. I’m so proud of her. Also uniquely interested in bringing something like this to our Newark Penthouse. #maplewood #girlswhopaint #art #artexhibit #girlsempowerment

TODAY I HONOR AVON- On the 8th of Women’s History Month, I’m thrilled to honor my baby girl Avon! Her artwork was chosen for the Just Like a Girl Exhibit at the 1978 Maplewood Arts Center alongside a few other select pieces. Our family showed up and showed out to support her first-ever art exhibit. I’m so proud of her. Also uniquely interested in bringing something like this to our Newark Penthouse. #maplewood #girlswhopaint #art #artexhibit #girlsempowerment

TODAY WE WORKED TOGETHER- Adonis has a solar system project, and I decided to order a 5ft inflatable Jupiter. Totally underestimated the process of inflating Jupiter, getting it into the car, to the school, and through the school doors (all of them), the list goes on… Adonis, Avon, and Avel’s dad came early, and we worked together to figure it out. I think all the kids will never forget that Jupiter is the largest planet.

Co-parenting is something you have to work on each and every day. Moments like this make the work worth it. #CoParenting #thejourneyiseverything #jupiter

TODAY WE WORKED TOGETHER- Adonis has a solar system project, and I decided to order a 5ft inflatable Jupiter. Totally underestimated the process of inflating Jupiter, getting it into the car, to the school, and through the school doors (all of them), the list goes on… Adonis, Avon, and Avel’s dad came early, and we worked together to figure it out. I think all the kids will never forget that Jupiter is the largest planet.

Co-parenting is something you have to work on each and every day. Moments like this make the work worth it. #CoParenting #thejourneyiseverything #jupiter

Carpe Diem #comedynight #nyc #thegrislypear #timeout #ladiesnight

Carpe Diem #comedynight #nyc #thegrislypear #timeout #ladiesnight

PART I: THE COLLAPSE NO ONE SAW COMING
Dear Family,

On October 2024, the ground shifted. Project Ready’s budget was cut by $1.8 million. By December, board members quietly stepped away. My team—my chosen family—prepared to leave too.

January 2025: I made the call no leader wants to make. I laid off my entire staff. The words felt like they belonged to someone else.

February: I called people I loved, explained uncertainty, tried to find language for a future I no longer recognized. There’s no guidebook for telling people you can’t protect them anymore.

March: I locked the doors on our community center—a dream barely begun. I stood there, keys in hand, feeling like I was abandoning a child.

Project Ready was never just a job. My own children grew up in its shadow—birthday parties postponed, school pickups between calls, my pride and exhaustion rooted in this work. Project Ready was their sibling, demanding just as much love and hope.

There’s a lesson I learned years ago: Hold fast to faith that you’ll prevail, but never flinch from the brutal facts. I thought I understood. I didn’t.

When collapse came, it was heartbreak. It was trauma. It was grief that lived in my bones.

I mourned not just the team or the mission, but the version of myself I no longer recognized. My self-esteem faltered. Tears came without warning. I grew tired in ways sleep couldn’t fix.
So I stopped running. I wrote. I cried. I sat in the discomfort until, slowly, I started to find myself again.

Here’s what I know now: I am not the same woman who started Project Ready. If service is this sacred, this personal, then honesty demands I stop pretending otherwise.

Some endings roar. Others are heartbreakingly quiet. This one made me face who I was, and who I could no longer be.

With love,�Shennell Barnes- Lomax
Part II — Where Grief Gives Way to Grace

PS: Thank you to everyone who held space for me in the dark. You know who you are….
#womeninbusiness #BuildingInPublic #founder #EntrepreneurialGrief #blackwomeninbusiness

PART I: THE COLLAPSE NO ONE SAW COMING
Dear Family,

On October 2024, the ground shifted. Project Ready’s budget was cut by $1.8 million. By December, board members quietly stepped away. My team—my chosen family—prepared to leave too.

January 2025: I made the call no leader wants to make. I laid off my entire staff. The words felt like they belonged to someone else.

February: I called people I loved, explained uncertainty, tried to find language for a future I no longer recognized. There’s no guidebook for telling people you can’t protect them anymore.

March: I locked the doors on our community center—a dream barely begun. I stood there, keys in hand, feeling like I was abandoning a child.

Project Ready was never just a job. My own children grew up in its shadow—birthday parties postponed, school pickups between calls, my pride and exhaustion rooted in this work. Project Ready was their sibling, demanding just as much love and hope.

There’s a lesson I learned years ago: Hold fast to faith that you’ll prevail, but never flinch from the brutal facts. I thought I understood. I didn’t.

When collapse came, it was heartbreak. It was trauma. It was grief that lived in my bones.

I mourned not just the team or the mission, but the version of myself I no longer recognized. My self-esteem faltered. Tears came without warning. I grew tired in ways sleep couldn’t fix.
So I stopped running. I wrote. I cried. I sat in the discomfort until, slowly, I started to find myself again.

Here’s what I know now: I am not the same woman who started Project Ready. If service is this sacred, this personal, then honesty demands I stop pretending otherwise.

Some endings roar. Others are heartbreakingly quiet. This one made me face who I was, and who I could no longer be.

With love,�Shennell Barnes- Lomax
Part II — Where Grief Gives Way to Grace

PS: Thank you to everyone who held space for me in the dark. You know who you are….
#womeninbusiness #BuildingInPublic #founder #EntrepreneurialGrief #blackwomeninbusiness

This Valentines Day I begged my husband Brandon Lomax to stay home, dine in, watch a great movie and perhaps take a nap. He didn’t disappoint. He cooked an amazing meal and ordered flowers and beautiful basket from Madonnas Garden!

He doesn’t know it yet but I’m about to drag him into rom-com land 😂. Can’t wait to watch Prime Video’s Relationship Goals.

Brandon, everyday feels like Valentines Day with you.
#ValentinesDay2026 #mymancancook #snuggletime #lovestory

This Valentines Day I begged my husband Brandon Lomax to stay home, dine in, watch a great movie and perhaps take a nap. He didn’t disappoint. He cooked an amazing meal and ordered flowers and beautiful basket from Madonnas Garden!

He doesn’t know it yet but I’m about to drag him into rom-com land 😂. Can’t wait to watch Prime Video’s Relationship Goals.

Brandon, everyday feels like Valentines Day with you.
#ValentinesDay2026 #mymancancook #snuggletime #lovestory

BEYOND THE BALLOT- In the editing room today wrapping up my new show produced by Freedom Studios filmed by NJIT - New Jersey Institute of Technology ‘s Highlander Stage studio!

If I can spend the rest of my life telling stories, creating spaces, being a good mom and being a good wife I’ll be happy. #thesweetspot #beyondtheballot #ibelong #lovewhatyoudo #bosslady #TrailBlazing #softlife

BEYOND THE BALLOT- In the editing room today wrapping up my new show produced by Freedom Studios filmed by NJIT - New Jersey Institute of Technology ‘s Highlander Stage studio!

If I can spend the rest of my life telling stories, creating spaces, being a good mom and being a good wife I’ll be happy. #thesweetspot #beyondtheballot #ibelong #lovewhatyoudo #bosslady #TrailBlazing #softlife

Oh hello twin! It’s braids and waves time for me and my baby girl Avon ❤️. #avonmccloud #twins #braidstyles #February

Oh hello twin! It’s braids and waves time for me and my baby girl Avon ❤️. #avonmccloud #twins #braidstyles #February

Tonight the @lakers game was a dream come true! As a parent all you ever want for your kids is to dream big and engage in experiences that might push them to the next level. Adonis got to go from court side to the box and pick up techniques for his next game. Added bonus I got to see nothing but smiles on my hubby @b_no_do ‘s face. #lebron #experiencelife #nba #dreamitwishitdoit #aaubasketball

Tonight the @lakers game was a dream come true! As a parent all you ever want for your kids is to dream big and engage in experiences that might push them to the next level. Adonis got to go from court side to the box and pick up techniques for his next game. Added bonus I got to see nothing but smiles on my hubby @b_no_do ‘s face. #lebron #experiencelife #nba #dreamitwishitdoit #aaubasketball

From the box to the floor tonight me and my two guys are showing out for the Los Angeles Lakers tonight!

Adonis is deeply into basketball and it’s been a dream of mine to have him see him play up close and personal. Shout-out to my husband Brandon Lomax for ensuring this dream could come true ❤️. #nba #lebronjames #gametime #dreamitdoit #onlythebest

From the box to the floor tonight me and my two guys are showing out for the Los Angeles Lakers tonight!

Adonis is deeply into basketball and it’s been a dream of mine to have him see him play up close and personal. Shout-out to my husband Brandon Lomax for ensuring this dream could come true ❤️. #nba #lebronjames #gametime #dreamitdoit #onlythebest

SLUMBER PARTY with some of the best of the best!

SLUMBER PARTY with some of the best of the best!

GIRLS TRIP LOADING!! In the middle of a big project I would never take care of myself. This next phase of my life will be filled with, joy, abundance, good wine, fun and love! First stop fried chicken sandwiches before Napa!

Thanks for taking a picture with us Bakesale Betty! #girlstrip #oakland

GIRLS TRIP LOADING!! In the middle of a big project I would never take care of myself. This next phase of my life will be filled with, joy, abundance, good wine, fun and love! First stop fried chicken sandwiches before Napa!

Thanks for taking a picture with us Bakesale Betty! #girlstrip #oakland

HAPPY MLK DAY! This morning we had a great time volunteering with Jersey Cares today to pack after school snacks for After-School All-Stars New Jersey in Newark! #MLKDay #MLKDayOfService #JerseyCares #actsofkindness #actsofservice

HAPPY MLK DAY! This morning we had a great time volunteering with Jersey Cares today to pack after school snacks for After-School All-Stars New Jersey in Newark! #MLKDay #MLKDayOfService #JerseyCares #actsofkindness #actsofservice

I BELONG HERE- I've spent the past decade occupying spaces that weren't built with me in mind, growing spaces that felt compromised by my input, and exhausting energy in environments that couldn't understand why I was exhausted to begin with…. Each aspect of this 4,500sqft space I've intentionally designed to match the moment- my moment, our moment- a space where it's safe to breathe, an environment that's safe to grow, a collective where all belong.

If you've been following me, you know I've done a lot, lol. Outside of my film, this project in the 17th Academy Penthouse has brought me the most joy. I want to take a moment to thank Paramount for believing in me when that was all I needed and for working with me for over seven months to bring this space to us.

Grand Opening in February!

This isn't the end, its just the beginning #ibelong #youbelong #thefreespaceproject #liberation #day8 #NewYearNewSpace

I BELONG HERE- I've spent the past decade occupying spaces that weren't built with me in mind, growing spaces that felt compromised by my input, and exhausting energy in environments that couldn't understand why I was exhausted to begin with…. Each aspect of this 4,500sqft space I've intentionally designed to match the moment- my moment, our moment- a space where it's safe to breathe, an environment that's safe to grow, a collective where all belong.

If you've been following me, you know I've done a lot, lol. Outside of my film, this project in the 17th Academy Penthouse has brought me the most joy. I want to take a moment to thank Paramount for believing in me when that was all I needed and for working with me for over seven months to bring this space to us.

Grand Opening in February!

This isn't the end, its just the beginning #ibelong #youbelong #thefreespaceproject #liberation #day8 #NewYearNewSpace

Still smiling after a beautiful visit with Moët Hennessy

So grateful to spend time with Joana—sharing vision, walking the space, and dreaming about what’s possible when values, culture, and community are centered. These are the moments that remind me that alignment feels light, intentional, and full of ease.

Feeling energized, affirmed, and excited for what’s unfolding at The Free Space Project.

More soon—but today, just gratitude and good vibes 🥂 #moetchampagne #Hennessy #IBelong #penthouse #freespace #newjersey #womenempowerment #womensupportingwomen

Still smiling after a beautiful visit with Moët Hennessy

So grateful to spend time with Joana—sharing vision, walking the space, and dreaming about what’s possible when values, culture, and community are centered. These are the moments that remind me that alignment feels light, intentional, and full of ease.

Feeling energized, affirmed, and excited for what’s unfolding at The Free Space Project.

More soon—but today, just gratitude and good vibes 🥂 #moetchampagne #Hennessy #IBelong #penthouse #freespace #newjersey #womenempowerment #womensupportingwomen

Heading into next week like…… #avelshennell #mybabygirl #gymnastics #gymnast

Heading into next week like…… #avelshennell #mybabygirl #gymnastics #gymnast

NEW YEAR, FREE SPACE! What you’re seeing is the beginning of The Free Space Project—a home for entrepreneurs, creatives, and leaders who are building through transition, growth, and reinvention.

This space is about possibility, belonging, and what happens when we give people room to build without pressure.

More to come. For now… welcome inside. #penthouse #freespace #belonging #economicmobility #newark

NEW YEAR, FREE SPACE! What you’re seeing is the beginning of The Free Space Project—a home for entrepreneurs, creatives, and leaders who are building through transition, growth, and reinvention.

This space is about possibility, belonging, and what happens when we give people room to build without pressure.

More to come. For now… welcome inside. #penthouse #freespace #belonging #economicmobility #newark

IT’S GAME TIME- and the family knows it. Day 3 of getting the Free Space Project up and running and the team is in full swing….. today trailblazers came in and claimed their space, more on that tomorrow #thebelongingcollective #familytime #freespaceproject #domoreofwhatmakesyouhappy

IT’S GAME TIME- and the family knows it. Day 3 of getting the Free Space Project up and running and the team is in full swing….. today trailblazers came in and claimed their space, more on that tomorrow #thebelongingcollective #familytime #freespaceproject #domoreofwhatmakesyouhappy

HARD QUESTIONS ON CHRISTMAS- Yesterday, with a large knot in my stomach, I dropped the kids off at their dad’s house because Christmas this year is his holiday. On the way down, my four-year-old said,

“Mommy, why does my life keep changing?”

I looked at her and said, “What do you mean, Princess?”

She said, “My schools change, my bedrooms change, my houses change.”

I could feel my grip on my steering wheel get tighter for about five seconds, trying to find the right words to bring my baby girl comfort, perhaps even to bring me comfort.

I said, “Mommy is always afraid of change. Change used to be one of my least favorite things. In fact, out of all my children, having you was the scariest because I thought everything would change. But as soon as you laid your head against my heart I couldn’t imagine life without you. You are one of the best changes.”

She smiled, put her hand on her heart, kissed me, and said she’d call me tomorrow. She ran off into her father’s arms, which brought me some comfort because I knew they would have a great Christmas. But the dull pain of not being there never goes away.

Most days, I’m not sure if I got it right. However, for those who are pushing through the change for Christmas, you’re doing the best you can.

Missing all of our children this year. Merry Christmas. #christmas #christmas2025 #blendedfamily #grief

HARD QUESTIONS ON CHRISTMAS- Yesterday, with a large knot in my stomach, I dropped the kids off at their dad’s house because Christmas this year is his holiday. On the way down, my four-year-old said,

“Mommy, why does my life keep changing?”

I looked at her and said, “What do you mean, Princess?”

She said, “My schools change, my bedrooms change, my houses change.”

I could feel my grip on my steering wheel get tighter for about five seconds, trying to find the right words to bring my baby girl comfort, perhaps even to bring me comfort.

I said, “Mommy is always afraid of change. Change used to be one of my least favorite things. In fact, out of all my children, having you was the scariest because I thought everything would change. But as soon as you laid your head against my heart I couldn’t imagine life without you. You are one of the best changes.”

She smiled, put her hand on her heart, kissed me, and said she’d call me tomorrow. She ran off into her father’s arms, which brought me some comfort because I knew they would have a great Christmas. But the dull pain of not being there never goes away.

Most days, I’m not sure if I got it right. However, for those who are pushing through the change for Christmas, you’re doing the best you can.

Missing all of our children this year. Merry Christmas. #christmas #christmas2025 #blendedfamily #grief

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The Belonging Collective

A movement of radical love, intentional space, and amplified voices.

17 Academy St.

Newark NJ 07018

info@belongingcollective.org

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